


crydevil babyman

by pizzaeater



Category: Devilman (Anime & Manga)
Genre: M/M, akira already knows ryo is satan, i use uwu and owo ironically in this a lot, miki has a protection squad, owo owo, ryo turns into satan a lot, uwu
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-03
Updated: 2018-08-04
Packaged: 2019-06-21 07:21:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15552552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pizzaeater/pseuds/pizzaeater
Summary: basically dmcb with some """"minor""""" changesthere will b 10 chapters like the 10 episodes of the show,, except a lot worse, or better, up 2 u. :pensive:





	1. i need u úwù

Akira was doing whatever he usually does when he was bored. He was his puny wimpy bitch baby boy self, trying his best to run. But we all know that he can’t. 

Ryo showed up and said, “Akira, come with me and all your dreams will come true. No catches. How bout it?” He stuck out his hand and a blue flame arose. Ryo was bill cipher.  
“Well Ryo, I don’t know if I wanna make a deal with a devil…” Akira said reluctantly. Akira was a huge cuphead fan. 

“Cuphead trash. Like actually. What, do you like undertale too? Please.” Ryo scoffed. He turned into satan right then and there. “Peace out, bitch.” Satan flew away. 

Akira then had an existential crisis, and wondered if liking anything was really worth it. He stood up out of his bed, because he was lazy as hell. “I’m going to prove Ryo wrong!” He said triumphantly, and dashed out of his home. 

 

Akira found himself standing in front of two big red doors. He had a deja vu moment but he brushed it off. Ryo had mentioned this place once. 

“There’s like, these big ass red doors, dude. And they’re huge! Big boy doors, you know? Thank satan I was able to get them to open. I almost called Akira to help but then I remembered he was a wimp! That boy… I don’t even know why I’m friends with him. Maybe satan likes him? Oh! Did I mention I have an evil darkside uwu? No? Oh, well, it all started when…” 

 

Akira had walked out of the cafe by then. Ryo had been talking to his friend, or at the very least it seemed like a friend. Ryo didn’t seem like the one to have friends. 

Akira mustered up the courage to open the “big ass red doors,” and his eyes were immediately flooded with bright lights and no no parts. He could hear bongos and synths. An odd combination, certainly, Akira thought. 

He walked into a bar area, and he saw a face he’d never expect to see: Miki! Right there, pouring drinks. What the actual f

“Akira! Pleasure seeing you here. Guess you finally put on your big boy boots, huh?” Miki didn’t give Akira a chance to respond. “That’s good. I can only assume you’re here to have fun winky wonky. I understand. If I were you I’d come here the first chance I’d get. Honestly, I can’t even imagine how hard it must be being a crybaby and STILL being a virgin, yeah?” 

What the hell? Was Miki suddenly british? “Hey, virginia’s cool, Miki!” Akira replied defensively. 

“Oh god, it’s worse than I expected. Ryo!” Miki yelled, and Ryo walked up to where Akira and Miki were talking. “Time for plan b, dude.” 

“Got it,” Ryo said, and grabbed Akira by the hand. “Akira, take this.” Ryo handed Akira a pill. 

“Oh sweet heavens! Is that a...drug?! Dear god, I’d never take one of those, not in a million years! My parents always told me not to and,” Akira started to say. 

“ffs just take it” ryo replied and he smooched akira *mwah* and he took the pill uwu uwu uwu. 

“My parents are going to hate me!” Akira started. “What if they come back and find out? Ryo!!!! You meanie!!!!” 

“Don’t worry Akira, they won’t be seeing you anytime soon!” Ryo replied, and grabbed his hand again to guide him towards some long couches.

 

“Now listen Akira. You’re a puny whiny bitch boy like that green haired guy from my boku hero academy. Except you’re not cool at all. It sucks, right?” Ryo asked Akira. 

Akira was highly offended. He started to question why he was even friends with Ryo in the first place. Was he ever nice to him? Did he ever treat him like an actual friend? No. He didn’t. 

“Anyways, Akira, could you go get me a beer uwu? I’m rich so I don’t have time to waste on pleb drinks. They are nice though. Think you could get me one though? Uwu uwu uwu?” asked Ryo. 

Akira was surprised, definitely. What the hell. 

Ryo didn’t know what boku no hero academia was?? The nerve of that boy. Whatever. 

“Fine, Ryo,” Akira said passive aggressively and walked down to the bar area again to greet Miki. 

 

“Hey, Akira! How’s it going so far? You meet anyone nice yet? OwO?” Miki asked. 

“No,,, i havent miki. Ryo gave me a pill and now I don’t feel so good…” Akira slurred. “I just need,, a beer,, ok?? Just 1. for ryo. yea” 

“Well, here you go Akira! Have fun!!!” Miki waved as Akira walked back to where Ryo was sitting, typing away at his white ass computer. Ryo was currently answering fan mail because of his anime series “Satan’s Other Side,” which had immediately grasped the attention of kpop fans and twilight fans alike. 

 

“Hey ryo,,,,, i got ur beer xdd here u go” Akira handed Ryo the beer.  
“Fantastic!” Ryo yelled. He poured the contents out onto the floor and smashed it against the sofa. 

“Well,, well jeez Ryo you could easily hurt someone!” Akira told Ryo hesitantly, but he had already started walking towards the middle of the cool no no owo party, smashed beer bottle in hand. 

“That’s the idea,” Ryo said, and cut one of the people dancing. Then another. And another.

“Alright Akira. That’s enough for now. Let’s get back to Miki.” Ryo dragged Akira back to Miki, where she watched as people started turning into demons and eating each other one way or another. “Wait.” Ryo said. “Wait here.” He walked off and Akira stood in the middle of the madness. 

chomp

Akira turned into big beefy boy Akira. And he went bam bam and then all of the demons were gone >:3c 

 

“Akira!” Ryo said as he walked up to him. “It worked! Now your life will be way better. This was all for you. So you wouldn’t be so whiny. It’s like when decker finally gets his powers. What do you think?” 

“It’s,,,,, deku,,,, a nd,”

“Whatever. Akira. What do you think of your new look?” Ryo repeated. 

 

“Wait a diddly darn minute, Ryo. What do you mean ‘new look’?” Akira asked. Miki pulled out a compact mirror and handed it to Akira. 

“OWO!!!!!”

Akira fell into a coma.


	2. one (1) hand is enough ù w Ó

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> title says it all, if u catch my drift

“Akira!!!” Ryo shook Akira’s body, laying on the peepee demon blood covered floor. Akira was still, sadly, in his coma. He had passed out from how different he was. 

“Miki, satan dammit!!! I told you, you show him the mirror LATER! Was I not clear?? Dummy??” Ryo scoffed again. He was an angery boy. He turned into Satan uwu. “You’ll be luck if I don’t blast you out of this party with my cool satan powers uwu.” 

“No,,, please Satan!! I just forgot and I didn’t mean to!!!!” Miki pleaded as Satan stuck out his hand.

“Say goodbye, bitch.” Satan was just about ready to blast her when the Miki Protection Squad swooped in to take her away. 

Miki was gone. 

Satan turned back into Ryo to pick up Akira and take him to the hoopital. The next day, he was back to his good normal self, except he was still a beefy boy self. 

 

Akira got out of bed and looked in his mirror. He was back at the Makimuras’ house. He was taken back by the changes again, but this time he didn’t pass out. 

“Wowie,, im a big boy now!!!” he said, and ran out of the house to school. He noticed how he was running really weirdly. It was really weird but hey, he was fast so whatever,,

 

When he got to school, everyone was all “OWO look at Akira!!!! He’s all big now!! Hes probably taking drugs!!!!” And to that Akira said,

“I honestly have no idea lol” 

Akira noticed these 2 girls trying to get into a room. He pulled the doors open without any struggle, and the girls swooned. Soon all of them were yelling at him, and akira turned around. All the girls got quiet. 

“I don’t do women.” 

And then all the girls yelled even more. aaaaAaaAAAaaaAAAAaaaAaaA -all the school girls 2018 

 

Later Akira was eating a bunch of food. Omnomomomomom, the school girls were giving him a ton of food, and akira ate it all. He must have really fast metabolism, smh :pensive:

Then he started watching no no videos that aren’t allowed, but he was a debiruman fused with amon so who could blame him u know? A bunch of people tried to get him to stop, but all he said was *ryo voice* “I don’t give a shit.” 

Cut to track and field, and akira was zooming down that track like it was nobodys business. Nyoomie zoomie. In 10 seconds, he had finished. He also had a big bulgie wulgie owo’’

 

As the school day ended, he went back to Ryo’s house for a bite to eat because the makimuras didn’t cater to akiras meaty needs. All they had was rabbit food,, lmao who needs that shit

Jenny had walked in with another plate of meaty meats, and and after she left, Akira was thirsty tbh, :pensive: 

“I hate to burst your bubble though, Akira,” Ryo started. “She’s taken. Sorry.” Akira then cried for two hours straight. 

She wasn’t, though. Ryo was lying. This was all part of his master plan. >:3cc 

 

Cut to Miki’s photographer, Mr. GenericAnimeName, fighting with someone that doesn’t matter in this story. 

“Like, dude!!! You ever hear that weird music that the kids listen to these days?? Like, down there near that one bridge? Totally sick, you gotta let me record there and the-” Mr. GenericAnimeName started to say, but the boss cut him off. 

“oKay then fuck u too!!!!! Bicth.” Mr. GenericAnimeName replied and stormed out of his office. 

 

Those evil demon boy uwus had started to chomp on this one guy because they were probably hungry. They noticed Mr. GenericAnimeName but were startled to hear amon behind them. 

“My fellow demons, how about we don’t eat these harmless homosapiens, yeah?” Akira tried to ask as nice as possible. The demons didn’t listen. 

“Oof big yikes big oof, we need these though lmao,, they taste great :ok-hand-emoji:”   
“Well if you don’t comply I’ll be forced to eat YOU!!!!!” Akira replied. 

“Right, ok Amon,” on of the demons had started to say, but he was chomped and debiru-bimu’ed out of existence. And so were the others. 

“Haha, suck on that,” Akira said triumphantly as he turned back into his normal beefy boy self and gave Ryo a big hug. 

As ryo hugged Akira, he noticed someone in the dump using an infrared light camera!! OWO!!!! They were recording too! Ryo dashed after him and caught up to him lickety split. 

“Listen, give us that camera, boy,” Ryo told Mr. GenericAnimeName. But Mr. GenericAnimeName refused. He slapped Ryo, and his perfect and soft skin was immediately bruised. Ryo could’ve turned into Satan right then and there, but for the sake of this fic, he didn’t. 

Mr. GenericAnimeName got away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i ,, updated it, surprise surprise ówò

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first fic oof,, ill be updating this,,,,,,,,probably..,,,,,,


End file.
